Staff Meeting (Jake first, then any faculty)

[N.P.C]

> "If I may say so.. perhaps we should not dismiss the matter at hand so easily--the invasion."“

"As always, Arthur, the aptness of your observations is incontrovertible." Hank McCoy’s voice is not loud, but it carries easily through the room as he enters. Nodding to Ororo, he continues, "Please accept my abject apologies for interrupting your august assemblage, but my investigations into the identities of our erstwhile invaders has extracted information of more than ephemeral interest. "

He hesitates a moment as he realizes that not everyone in the room is cleared for X-Men business, then shrugs it off – they were caught up in the invasion, after all, which makes this their business as much as anybody’s. "You are all, I assume, acquainted with Professor Richards’ spectacular discovery of 2,4,7-dimethyl-3-cis-but-2…" he trails off as most of the room’s eyes glaze over, and tries again, "That is, the Anomalous Genetic Sequence Expressor popularly identified as “Mutant Growth Hormone” or “AntiCure”… yes?"

{{ OOC: Check out Reply 4 to this thread for background, if this rings no bells. ))

Without really waiting for a response, he continues "From my analysis of the admittedly eclectic tissue samples left behind by our uninvited guests, such as the barb-fingered miscreant who injured Miss Craft here, it appears they are only superficially mutants – they have, in fact, been artificially augmented by the aforementioned compound. "

He frowns. "Furthermore, indirect interrogation of appropriate officials within the United Nations indicates that the agency that initiated inimical action against our aerodynamic associate," he pauses to indicate Warren, "and the object of his affections, were indeed of gallic origin, which implies that our opponents are global in scope and intent. However, I have been unable to discern any further details about them as yet." He shrugs.

"I will return to my researches after this momentary pause and attempt to discern further details… in the meantime, however, I would be remiss if I ignored the festivities!" With that he leaps into the air, plucking an éclair from a plate between two toes, and lands in a handspring underneath the mistletoe, waggling his eyebrows at Toni. "Well dear? Don’t tell me your put off by my chromatic idiosynchracies… or… ah, I see. It must be the gravity of the situation." He pushes up from the ground, grabbing the ceiling with his feet and crouching so his head is roughly at head-height, though upside down. "There… does that alleviate your altitudinal aversion?"

[Ororo Munroe]

> "You’re assuming he’d use his control to avoid hurting her…"

“Perhaps you’re right. In any case, he’s very fond of you, and the last thing we need is bloodshed between teammates. Everyone is mostly healed, and I would like to keep it that way.” A small smile tugs at the corner of Ororo’s lips. She continues to listen to their banter.

> "No...except maybe that one time I walked in on him in the shower...with our darling Warren no less."

Josh and Warren were quickly becoming one of the most stable couples around the Institute. Most of the teens tended to have on-again, off-again romances, but the sight of the two of them together had become ordinary before Ororo quite realized it. Not that they were particularly public about their affection, of course. When in Warren’s company, Josh seemed to unintentionally exude a telepathic happiness that was unmistakable. Initially, Warren’s playboy streak following Alcatraz had given her concern over their relationship, but everything she’d sensed about the older boy had been true. He was responsible, upright, and a good man - he’d just been shorted a childhood. Josh seemed to be trying to take care of that. More interestingly, the two of them appeared to be exhibiting an almost precognitive sense of each other, something she’d noticed over the years in Scott and Jean - something that had helped them out in more than one tight situation.

> "Well then, Jake. Why don't you just coincidence-ize your adorable bottom underneath that little bush over there"

Ororo is considering how much she’d have to adjust the strength of a miniature lightning bolt, to account for Toni’s iron composition, when Hank fortunately (or not?) arrives on scene. She nods at Arthur’s mention of the invasion.

> "That is, the Anomalous Genetic Sequence Expressor popularly identified as “Mutant Growth Hormone” or “AntiCure”… yes?"

She begins to translate for those not as fluent in Hank. “In November, the famed scientist Reed Richards, and his wife, Susan, were working on a synthetic version of the Cure. They were attacked, and they, along with Susan’s brother and a family friend, were exposed to the experiment. All of them developed mutations similar to ours, but induced based on variations in their genetic code, whereas ours surfaced naturally.”

> "they have, in fact, been artificially augmented by the aforementioned compound."

“Interesting.” She tilts her head towards Hank. “Then you will be, no doubt, visiting the Richards at the Baxter Building. Any idea on whether Reed and Susan know someone has appropriated their formula?”

[N.P.C]

> " Then you will be, no doubt, visiting the Richards at the Baxter Building."

Hank grins broadly, or perhaps bares his teeth threateningly – his bestial facial structure often makes it difficult to tell the difference, and under the circumstances either seems called for. "A predictably precise prognostication, my dear. However, it would appear the canonical better part of valor to conceal the true purpose of my visit until the local topology is more precisely calculated. To that end I’ve arranged an ostensibly diagnostic consultation with respect to young Mr. Drake, to establish likely parameters of his current condition."

He shrugs somewhat sheepishly (an odd gesture when delivered upside-down from a foothold on the ceiling), scratches the back of his head with an idle claw, and adds "Our prodigal pyrokinetic insisted rather, er, heatedly on participating… though I suspect his interest is, shall we say, more proprietary than pedagogical? "

> " Any idea on whether Reed and Susan know someone has appropriated their formula?"

" Certainty is elusive on the issue. Their project was initially government-funded, after all, albeit with a different goal… presumably the intellectual property is subject to government review. Whether they are aware of the purpose to which their research is being put, I cannot assert definitively. Common sense would predict a military application, but, though it pains me to say this of an otherwise brilliant colleague, common sense has never been Reed’s forte. Surely Susan has at least speculated on the possibility, however… she is by far the more pragmatic of the pair." His eyes twinkle briefly as he looks over at Jake, then back at Storm. "Perhaps appellation and aptitudes are more closely correlated than straightforward statistical analysis supports, eh?"

He chuckles, very much as if he’d just made a joke, then purses his lips as if eating something distasteful. "In any event, I would prefer not to speculate as to her degree of complicity. A scenario in which it is comfortably low is unpleasantly challenging to construct." He sighs, then frowns. "But we must plan for contingencies, however distasteful. To that end, I have additionally obtained authorization to bring Mr. Dalton along, ostensibly on a “field trip” to the lab of a more conventional geneticist… and the irrepressible Miss Craft as his teacher and chaperone, if she consents… though I feel obliged to point out, my dear lady," he adds in Toni’s direction with a grin, "that I suspect that relation may become rather reversed?"

(( OOC: Dear God, Hank-dialog is a pain to write. ))

[Ororo Munroe]

> Our prodigal pyrokinetic insisted rather, er, heatedly on participating… though I suspect his interest is, shall we say, more proprietary than pedagogical?

Ororo crosses her arms over her chest. “John has been on good behavior since his return. If he really is interested in going along, I don’t see the harm in it.” Proprietary… Ororo wasn’t really sure what was going on between John, Bobby, and Rogue - and as far as she could determine, neither did they. However their relationships were changing, the last thing they needed was for it to interfere with mission, though. This sort of thing would probably be a good opportunity for John to get re-acclimated with the way the X-Men did things. With Hank leading, there was little that could go wrong.

> Perhaps appellation and aptitudes are more closely correlated than straightforward statistical analysis supports, eh?

Hilarious, Hank. Why on Earth did you give up a promising future as a comedian to become a scientist and UN ambassador? Ororo attempts to give him a glare as best she’s able, but her mind is already working on all of the new information, and she appears lost in thought for a moment.

> But we must plan for contingencies, however distasteful. To that end, I have additionally obtained authorization to bring Mr. Dalton along, ostensibly on a “field trip” to the lab of a more conventional geneticist… and the irrepressible Miss Craft as his teacher and chaperone, if she consents…

“A fine idea. Between the two of you, I think you’ve got the physical and mental avenues covered?” Ororo turns to Toni at this statement. “Despite his lack of finesse, if any… complications arise, John should also be helpful.” She tactfully does not mention Bobby. He has enough problems without others mentioning his increased vulnerability on the battlefield. Ororo was confident that the younger boy’s powers would return shortly, but for the time being, his participation in combat situations worried her to some extent. He also seemed to think she was going to toss him off the team, which frankly Ororo found upsetting. Do I really come off as that cold? On the plus side, his grades were already showing a definite improvement… so it was a kind of mixed blessing.

“So the team looks to be yourself, Bobby, John, Josh, and Toni. When are you planning on leaving? Despite your ulterior motives, I suspect both Toni and Josh will find the Richards’ research facilities impressive.”

[Warren Worthington III]

> " So the team looks to be yourself, Bobby, John, Josh, and Toni. When are you planning on leaving?"

Hank replies "A certain degree of alacrity would appear advisable, so with Miss Craft’s agreement I will confirm arrangements for tomorrow afternoon. "

After decoding Hank’s language, Warren can’t help but agree: the sooner they can track down whatever leads they can find, the sooner they’ll find out who caused it.

It’s also a relief to hear that Hank is making progress on the political front – Warren himself had called in most of his political favors during their attempt to shut down the Camps, and a lot of phone calls are going unanswered now. (Which is particularly frustrating, since the Camp-shutdown bill had quietly evaporated in the face of the Brotherhood’s invasion of Neverland, so it all came to nothing; he hasn’t quite been able to look Bobby Drake in the eye since then, especially after "stealing" his roommate. Which is silly, but there it is)

He’d even been desperate enough to contact Emma Frost again, despite knowing how Josh feels about her, only to discover that she was no longer affiliated with the Hellfire Club! He wonders what that’s all about, but isn’t really complaining: on the whole he’d be just as happy if she never surfaced again.

It’s also a relief, albeit a minor one, to hear that whatever came after him and Josh and the Institute was really a global operation rather than just targeting the X-Men – while fighting governments doesn’t thrill him, it beats worrying about a private organization controlling those kinds of resources.

And the entangled mess of all this would be funny if it weren’t for the bodycount: the Brotherhood invades the government, the Institute invades the Brotherhood, the government invades the Institute and the Brotherhood, the Brotherhood sends their psycho psychic to invade Warren (whose head is still ringing from the aftermath of all that)… it’s all pretty crazed. God… if I’d known it was going to be like this, I might have just stayed on the West Coast.

Except he wouldn’t have, since if he had, he’d never have met Josh. Or, and he can’t help but smile wryly at the thought, adopted a still-nameless French puppy. He’d turned down Josh’s suggestion of “Charlie” (in honor of Professor Xavier) after Hank had tracked down the name of the crazy woman who’d attacked them; his facetious counter-offer of “Mr. Bill” (in honor of its remarkable talent for running in front of dangerously heavy objects) had been summarily – and grouchily – rejected; and Hank had squelched Bob Drake’s (presumably facetious) suggestion of “Beast.” So it was still “Puppy” for now. Far more importantly, it had proved easier to house-train than Warren had feared, no doubt largely thanks to Josh’s telepathic influence.

Anyway…

"All right… moving on, then? Baxter Building, repairs, non-bone-shattering Twister… check, check, check. And Toni, you really do have to kiss Hank before he does permanent damage to the ceiling tiles…"

[Toni Craft]

“It was all perfectly innocent, of course… flying lessons tend to get muddy, is all.  Or, rather, landing lessons do."  Never one to miss out on an opportunity, Toni responds cheerily. 

“Well Warr, next time you or Josh…or both,”  She grins slyly. “Wanna do some more landing lessons, count me in.  I’m always up for some messy fun.”  Toni winks at him and finishes off her second round of eggnog.
 
"Only if you promise not to step on my foot this time. Last time it took hours for my ankle to heal!" 

“Just be happy that it was only your foot.  There are much more valuable things that can be stepped on, and one in particular that I know Josh would rather keep non-squished."  She beams and quickly scurries away before Warren can retaliate.

"If I may say so.. perhaps we should not dismiss the matter at hand so easily--the invasion."

"Come on, Artie! Someone as cute as you shouldn't be so serious all the time. It doesn't suit you." Ignoring the fact that there's no mistletoe above his head (but he doesn't know that), Toni gives him a quick kiss on the cheek, just to see what the man would do. But her fun is momentarily put on hold as Hank McCoy joins the group. 

"You are all, I assume, acquainted with Professor Richards’ spectacular discovery of 2,4,7-dimethyl-3-cis-but-2…” To Toni, the resident chemistry know-it-all, that makes perfect sense, but Hank clarifies for all the non-know-it-alls.  “Mutant Growth Hormone” or “AntiCure”… yes?  From my analysis of the admittedly eclectic tissue samples left behind by our uninvited guests, such as the barb-fingered miscreant who injured Miss Craft here, it appears they are only superficially mutants.” 

“That didn’t stop him from putting three holes in my shoulder though." And she’s got the scars to prove it.  "You wanna see?”  Toni had been fortunate—massive blood-loss aside—the barbs had been comprised of an iron-based compound, probably a super-strong variant of steel.  Instead of having them removed, which would have been excruciatingly painful, Toni had simply let her body metabolize the metal, rendering them harmless. She was still sore, no doubt about that, but the wound had more or less healed and she was ready for action again...provided her brother ever let her out of the mansion again.

"Well dear? Don’t tell me your put off by my chromatic idiosynchracies." Toni raises an eyebrow, examining the upside down professor with poorly hid amusement.

"Now Hank, you know I have a kinky fascination with fur. Pink is preferred, but I can do with blue." Toni gives the older, furrier, well-spoken mutant a firm, full kiss. It lasts a little longer than expected, but as far as she's concerned, it's all a part of the show. "Hee! You tickle!"

"I have additionally obtained authorization to bring Mr. Dalton along, ostensibly on a “field trip” to the lab of a more conventional geneticist… and the irrepressible Miss Craft as his teacher and chaperone, if she consents… though I feel obliged to point out, my dear lady, that I suspect that relation may become rather reversed?"

"Now now Hank. Is that how you treat a fellow scientist?" Toni mock offends, then grins. "But yeah, if that flaming guy's going to be there, I might need a little supervision if we're going to be keeping everything PG13-rated."

" So the team looks to be yourself, Bobby, John, Josh, and Toni. When are you planning on leaving?"

"A certain degree of alacrity would appear advisable, so with Miss Craft’s agreement I will confirm arrangements for tomorrow afternoon. "

"You got it, Blue Boy!" Toni starts to wonder if permanent damage can be done if one hangs upside down long enough, as Hank remains bolted to the ceiling.

"And Toni, you really do have to kiss Hank before he does permanent damage to the ceiling tiles…"

"Well Warren, if you insist!" And then Toni kisses Hank again. "That one was for free."

[Arthur Coleman]

The music teacher nods to Hank, as his observation is regarded, and he feels somewhat at ease now that the conversation is taking a more professional turn. Although, that solid ground would do nothing to prepare him for what was about to come next..

Come on, Artie! Someone as cute as you shouldn't be so serious all the time. It doesn't suit you. Actual color tinges Arthur's face as Toni quickly kisses him on the cheek, the poor man looking quite startled and confused. Although he had sensed her presence nearing, he had been backed into a corner as it were already, and there had been no place for him to move. He clears his throat akwardly, only stammering with a few unintellgible noises that perhaps to him are some semblance of words. Arthur rubs at one of his arms uncertainly, unintentionally making himself a slight barrier cacoon out of his thin appendage to keep whatever personal space he curretnly has remaining.

He listens to the conversations around him with an almost dazed focus, the kiss obviously quite unexpected. For most men, they would be able to shake it off quickly, but Arthur was obviously not like other men.

Well, Warren, if you insist! That one was for free.

Arthur lets out a slow breath, hoping that this would quickly conclude the staff meeting so that he may slip out discreetly, feeling more than a little embarrassed.

(Not much of an addition, but who doesn't want to see Artie all flustered, hm? x3)

[Bernhard Putzkammer]

“Now now, m’lady!” Bernhard Putzkammer, or Mr. Putz to the kids, says in his loud, but light German accent as he approaches the kitchen. He had just been witness to an upside down, blue, furry UN ambassador get a rather generous kiss by one of the Institute’s younger and odder teachers. “You can’t be letting Hank have all the fun. The holidays are all about the giving remember?” He holds up two bottles of wine, each topped with a bright red Christmas bow. “With that in mind, how about you continue the giving?” He asks, avoiding Hank and stepping beneath the mistletoe. “And I meant Toni, not you, furball.” Bernie grins and waits for his kiss before proceeding into the teacher-filled kitchen.

“So, what did I miss? Obviously not the alcohol.” He notes, pulling a corkscrew from his back pocket. With a muted Pop! Bernie pulls the cork from each bottle and sets the wine next to the glasses. “Please folks, help yourself. It’s a good year. Very nice with a little brie, actually.”

Bernie’s taste in wine had always been impeccable, probably due to his extensive experience, and his German heritage. He had picked those particular bottles especially for the festive occasion, and he’d be damned if he was the only one drinking.

[N.P.C]

Toni’s first kiss leaves Hank somewhat speechless… the second seems to reverse the effect. "Gracious lady, there are days I regret that the metaphorical designer of my idiosyncratic genome did not see fit to incorporate a tail along with the other bestial attributes… I assure you it would be wagging assiduously. "

> " You can’t be letting Hank have all the fun. [..]And I meant Toni, not you, furball."

Hank flips from the ceiling to the floor with startling grace for someone so bulky, then slouches melodramatically, slamming the back of a too-large, blue-furred hand against his forehead and throwing his head back. "Woe! To be dismissed so cavalierly! Shall my ego ever recover?"

A moment later he stands normally and shrugs. "I expect so, actually." To Bernie he adds, mock-sternly: "However, sir, if you expect me to tolerate casually a rival for my lady’s affections, you are far from mistaken. I shall have my hypothetical seconds call upon you. Pistols at dawn! Cartridges at dusk! Far less possibility of awkward injury that way." With that, he bounds back towards the labs.

[Warren Worthington III]

It takes Warren a minute or two to work out what Hank just said, then he shakes his head and chuckles. "Has he always talked like that? There are days I think he’s using the size of his vocabulary to compensate for shortcomings in other areas… "

> " So, what did I miss? Obviously not the alcohol. Please folks, help yourself. It’s a good year. Very nice with a little brie, actually."

"I guess I should have brought the brie, Bernie" Warren walks over to join him, glass in hand, and waits for him to fill it. "I wonder how well it goes with onion dip?" He grins, and adds "Well, you clearly didn’t miss the mistletoe show. Mostly X-Men business, really, and a report on building repairs."

He looks over at Ororo and Jake, who still don’t seem quite ready to resume running the faculty meeting, and shrugs. "Any student issues we should all know about? I’ve met one of the new arrivals, Tobias – enough attitude for any three students, and a power we’re going to have to keep an eye on, but his heart seems to be in the right place. What about the new girl – Laurie, right? Anything we ought to know?"